Lau's Buffet King - The Classic Chinese Buffet

You can spend all kinds of silly money on extravagant gourmet cuisine these days, but there comes a time in everyone's lives when they simply need cheap and greasy fill. The original Lau's Chinese buffet is the place that will fulfil that purpose. From corporate lawyers to cheapo students, everyone needs an inexpensive Chinese buffet in their lives. They're as a essential as a toothbrush. That's not to say the food is terrible quality, everything is cooked well and all of your classic dishes are available, at exceptionally cheap rates. Although Lau's only undercut the cost of their buffet by a pound or two versus the other 'cheap' buffet restaurants of China town, they deliver a superior standard of dishes that will please almost every diner. Service is always fine and it's very rare to find a dish that's empty. There is, of course, far more exotic and better quality a la carte style Chinese restaurants on this street. But when you're on a budget, you simply will not find anywhere in Newcastle that beats Lau's for cost effectiveness. And when you're as insatiably hungry as the Fat Spoon often is, then this place is the answer to your prayers. 72%

The LB Restaurant - Drunkards Delight

The one and only curry house that is open well past all of the pubs, and thus it is a common destination for the hungry merry makers. But that doesn't mean it isn't a suitable restaurant for any other time of day. Also known as Latif's or Latif Balti this surprising large but well hidden restaurant offers all of the classic Indian and Pakistani dishes you would expect. The service is always excellent, whether your as sober as a judge or as battered as Irishman on St. Paddy's day. Often Latif himself is on hand to welcome patrons/diners. The pricing of the food is highly acceptable and they aren't overly cheeky with the cost of Cobra's unlike a lot of Indian restaurants. They even offer a Gourmet Society discount, further making it a superior munchies quencher over the likes of the kebab shop or MacDonald's. Don't expect anything overly exotic or contemporary, the format is as straight forward as you need when your intoxicated. Although it is a favourite with post-pub curry hunters, the food as actually quite good. Dishes are cooked with a clear level of experience and taste great, sober or smashed. The warming atmosphere of the restaurant is also great, although care must be taken, getting too relaxed could result in you snoozing in your saag paneer or spilling madras all over your own crotch. Not that the Fat Spoon would ever do anything so undignified. The only down side is (and it is a crucial one) that the next day you will most likely be spending some quality time with your friend John, i.e. your bowels may well be rupturing like Mount Etna. 70%

The Cave - Meat and Vodka All Round

Previously operating as a speciality Polish restaurant under the guise of "Restaurant Krakow" this place now delivers a range of Polish, Russian and German dishes....as well as some random pizzas. That said, the majority of this alternative European cuisine really compliments the furred-lined hardwood Russian-ice-bar style venue. And as the name suggests, it is somewhat like walking into a random cave in the middle of one of Newcastle's busiest restaurant streets. Although the dishes aren't spectacularly extravagant, nor do they boast particularly exotic ingredients...but they are interesting, well cooked and do come in good portions sizes. Expect meat-rich dishes that definitely won't leaving you hunting for a takeaway on the way home. The cheeky Eastern European waitresses also really add to the restaurant's theme. All in all, a cool experience that is well worth a visit, and being another Gourmet Society member makes it a relatively cheap option. Serving the homemade paté with a large shot of vodka is also a stroke of genius that makes the Fat Spoon very happy. 76%

Happiness Inn - The Daredevil's Chinese

Despite this restaurant being situated in a prime location, it often goes unnoticed by pretty much everyone. In all fairness it isn't the most appealing looking restaurant, but overlooking the Happiness Inn would mean missing out on some of the finest Chinese cuisine in the city. After clambering up the derelict stairwell you will be shocked to find a relatively attractive palace-like restaurant with an imperial aura about it. You are immediately greeted by exceptionally joyous staff (so happy that you might question their recreational habits), who will offer you a crucial choice. A choice that will dictate the outcome of your meal for gourmet glory or dining disaster. Opt for the Chinese menu, as the English menu will only disappoint you more than NUFC's recent games. The Chinese menu, however, holds a huge host of excellent and authentic dishes, brimming with flavour, spice and delight. The level of service remains excellent throughout the night as you struggle to decide what you want to eat, as part of the fun of the Chinese menu is deciphering it. Although there are some pictures and short English descriptions of the dishes, they can often be very misleading, or even completely wrong. The food is brilliant, but there are a number of dishes that offer parts of animal that you didn't think were remotely edible. Despite looking like alien genitalia, the frilled kidneys are exceptional, a must try. On the other hand  the Fat Spoon will eat most things, except chicken feet, they're easily the most hideous thing on the planet. The stew style dishes are particularly tasty and great value for menu as they're gigantic. Life is far too short to stick to the boring lemon chicken dishes and bland chow meins. Take a risk and give the wonders of the Happiness Inn a try. 79%