Moulin Rouge Cafe - Hidden Persian Gem

Westgate road and the areas of Fenham that it lead up to are an absolute haven for numerous sub-standard 'cafés', 'restaurants' and 'takeaways' of sheer filth. Generic, baseless menu's that poorly represent Persian or Asian cuisine; childishly and arrogantly parading shawarmas, kebabs and mixed grills of questionable meat, married with lacklustre flavours in vulgar venues. Many of which even the drunk-beyond-belief low life of the region would turn their noses up at. But it isn't all doom and grease on Westgate Road, there are handful of hidden gems amongst the rotten eggs and Moulin Rouge is definitely the crown jewel amongst them.

Moulin Rouge is a god send for anyone looking for an affordable but delicious solution to authentic Persian cuisine. Fresh ingredients, a simple open kitchen, daily specials and a very welcoming atmosphere are all features that Moulin Rouge should certainly pride themselves on. Better still, their not afraid of going beyond the standard 'grilled meat with rice on a plate', (although they do that very well too), they also provide a selection of less common traditional dishes....a wet dream for any restaurant punter sick of the sight of generic dishes that riddle dining culture these days.

Although it appears to be a simple café, Moulin Rouge is a whole lot more than that, their more complex specials, cheerful BYOB policy and highly accommodative service means that you can celebrate almost any occasion in this perfectly relaxed rustic venue. And if that wasn't enough, the sheer cost effectiveness and clean-eat nature of their cuisine will have you coming back time and time again. Although if you are wanting your fill of grease, then they've also perfected the art of hangover breakfasts, offering bargainous fry-ups that might literally save your bacon. On top of all that, they even have plenty of choice for those odd vegetarian types! - literally every man, woman and child needs to give Moulin a try. 81%

Istanbul Cafe Bistro - Rustic but Radgie

Just a stones throw away from the (relative) bustle of Haymarket is what seems to be a new installation of actual Turkey (the country, not the munter of a bird). That being an exceptionally authentic three storey cafe/tower serving delicious home cooked Turkish cuisine. You may begin to question your safety as you climb the first hostel-like stairway, but once you're tackled with the distinct aroma of their open BBQ grill coupled with an almost agressive amount of spice and garlic, you will know you've made a solid choice. These sorts of establishments can be judged on your inabilty to pronounce the names of dishes, the more drunk you sound...the better the selection; and at Istanbul they don't disappoint! Here they over a wide range of healthy but flavoursome grilled meat dishes, all of the expected classic hot and cold mezze dishes as well as those taste infusion dishes involving lamb and lentils and aubergine that you would expect from a proper Turkish diner. They also have some interesting breakfast dishes and some frankly weird desserts for the bold. As is also typical with such places the food is very very well priced, the decor is plain ugly and the staff are a little moody - possibly incapable of smiling at all first, though a few jokes in they'll warm to most people. But thats part of the package, so rough it up and get some doner meat done properly down you. 72%

Happiness Inn - The Daredevil's Chinese

Despite this restaurant being situated in a prime location, it often goes unnoticed by pretty much everyone. In all fairness it isn't the most appealing looking restaurant, but overlooking the Happiness Inn would mean missing out on some of the finest Chinese cuisine in the city. After clambering up the derelict stairwell you will be shocked to find a relatively attractive palace-like restaurant with an imperial aura about it. You are immediately greeted by exceptionally joyous staff (so happy that you might question their recreational habits), who will offer you a crucial choice. A choice that will dictate the outcome of your meal for gourmet glory or dining disaster. Opt for the Chinese menu, as the English menu will only disappoint you more than NUFC's recent games. The Chinese menu, however, holds a huge host of excellent and authentic dishes, brimming with flavour, spice and delight. The level of service remains excellent throughout the night as you struggle to decide what you want to eat, as part of the fun of the Chinese menu is deciphering it. Although there are some pictures and short English descriptions of the dishes, they can often be very misleading, or even completely wrong. The food is brilliant, but there are a number of dishes that offer parts of animal that you didn't think were remotely edible. Despite looking like alien genitalia, the frilled kidneys are exceptional, a must try. On the other hand  the Fat Spoon will eat most things, except chicken feet, they're easily the most hideous thing on the planet. The stew style dishes are particularly tasty and great value for menu as they're gigantic. Life is far too short to stick to the boring lemon chicken dishes and bland chow meins. Take a risk and give the wonders of the Happiness Inn a try. 79%

Little Asia - Budget Authenticity

If you're looking for very fresh and vibrant Chinese cuisine that won't pillage your wallet, then Little Asia is where you need to be. As you step into this little wonder you will instantly know that the food will be the real deal. You will be confronted by a divine aroma, typical of traditionally prepared Chinese food. The decor is extremely rustic, bordering on dilapidated, but here it's all about the food. It may take you up to 3 hours to decide what to eat, as the menu is the size of an Argos catalogue, but staff are happy to recommend their favourites. Although some dishes may not be to your taste or may exhibit cuts of meat that aren't commonly found in a Western diet. However, largely the food is fantastic. Rich in flavour and arriving in monstrous portions with generous quantities of meat, these dishes really are great! With mains costing as little as £7 and being large enough to feed half of Newcastle, Little Asia fits even the tightest of diners' budgets. A must for anyone who is sick of the generic and bland Chinese buffet restaurants of Newcastle. 82%

Al Basha - Fairly Hideous

Although Al Basha is quite highly rated by some, the Fat Spoon was not impressed. The décor is about as classy as a pint of Lambrini and looks more dated than your Grandma's curtains. Although the food was indeed authentic Lebanese cuisine, prepared to a decent standard and quite tasty; finding part of the chef in the chicken shawarma was far from ideal. A thick black hair protruding from your meal is usually enough to put off the majority of restaurant goers, but failing to offer a refund as a result seals the deal. Unacceptable. Further to this, the table service was sluggish and careless, enough to send the Fat Spoon into a state of unforgiving rage. Perhaps on a different occasion Al Basha might have lived up to it's expectations, but evidently consistency isn't their strong point. Rating....very poor. 22%