Shortly after the arrival of Kaspa's Desserts, what appears to be a rival but otherwise identical ice cream and desserts chain has hit Newcastle's ever swanky Bigg Market, this one is called Creams. And the dessert house clone is very much identical in every way, offering the same range of ice creams, waffles and crepes, in the same vulgar American format, sprinkled with the same essence of tackiness and the same drizzle of over vibrancy. Creams even looks and sounds the same, brandishing the same tasteless black and pink styling as well as the same obscene soundtrack selected to draw in teenage girls and chav families in their masses.
To give credit where credit is due, the desserts and ice creams at Creams are tasty. They do offer a monstrously encompassing range of flavours and styles at vaguely reasonable prices. And if you're looking for a filthy fix of waffles and multi-flavour ice cream then Creams has exactly what you need. Like Kaspa's its best to avoid the whipped cream and whippy ice cream doused sundaes and go straight for the un-adulterated ice creams. - where you can tailor make your own combo from some excellent ice creams, gelatos and sorbets. But all that is hardly a revelation, their entire menu is composed of sugar and fat - only an utter moron could get such a cuisine wrong.
Although some of the staff at Cream's are very friendly and charming, others are clearly menaces to society. On the Fat Spoon's recent visit, one member of staff thought it would be wise to use a red hot sundae glass, straight from the dishwasher, to serve ice cream. It's ice cream you complete imbecile. Even a rabid chimp could probably see the error in this, yet the concept of melting ice cream clearly escaped at least one member of Cream's team. All in all, Cream's is at least honest, it knows exactly what it is and is correctly placed at the corner of the Bigg Market. And being completely indistinguishable from it's carbon copy - Kaspa's, it can only receive an identical meagre rating. 57%
The Only Fools and Horses reference isn't there to suggest that their menu has any equestrian dishes on it, although there is certainly something a little shady going on at Mamak Corner. This Malaysian (but also unconvincingly also Chinese) restaurant, situated at the very end of Stowell street has a lot going for it. Their venue is very attractive, with it's whole crispy ducks in the window and clean finish. The waiting staff are very friendly and there are some really tasty dishes on the menu that differ greatly from the typical Chinese dishes elsewhere on the street. This is of course thanks to their Malay orientation, which they need to be more proud and forthcoming with...why the hell are you competing with Chinese cuisine on the only street in Newcastle that has as many of them as Downtown Beijing?!
The menu is definitely worth sampling and despite the bewilderment riddled within, you can bag yourself something truly delicious. However, make a wrong choice and you can easily be chowing down on a dish that's got a worse bone to meat ratio than a carcass, or bits of fatty meat that may turn you to the dark side (Vegetarianism)! But for the adventurous, this is merely just another challenge to be conquered and enjoyed. The main thing that lets down Mamak Corner, is that although it has a stunning bar, well equipped with a variety of spirits and wines...they don't serve alcohol?! This makes the Fat Spoon very very upset. It's all very well not serving alcohol for whatever reason, but don't lure in the Friday night club with your malicious J2O-serving deception and tea-drinking treachery! We won't ask how the lost their alcohol license...
With this being quite a set back for the restaurant, dinners may choose to opt for visiting this place under lunchtime arrangements. And that can be well accommodative with the variety of special offers, including super cheap set menus, karaoke and even... happy hour drink offers?! At least their confusion is consistent. This is definitely somewhere that could be great, also needs Gordon to come along and give it a huge kick up the backside. 55%
