Lola Jeans Newcastle - The Brasserie Bar

Newcastle is rapidly becoming a hub of fine dining and international cuisine culture, which is further supported by an ever-flourishing development of brilliant new bars and pubs. Many of these new establishments try their hand at being somewhere in between. This is what sets the new installation of Lola Jeans apart, it isn't a hybrid like some of the other cowboys. It is both a stunningly beautiful bar as well as an elegant yet full-bodied dining experience.

Developed as a re-mastered version of the well established Lola Jeans in Tynemouth, the new site has gone above and beyond it's predecessor in terms of décor and vibe. The vintage styling here trumps that of any other venue in the city and will instantly generate an ambience of finesse without feeling archaic. The drinks menu isn't the most extensive, but it doesn't need to be. Most of the classic cocktails are there as well as some original numbers and are delivered with sensual precision. Accompanied with some great beers and again a small but strong wine menu means Lola Jeans is the perfect bar for relaxed drinks with any crowd.

Although the Tynemouth branch has a solid menu, it's city centre sister is much more provocative and racy. They've made increased efforts at being much more extraordinary compared to some of it's competitors, denoted by the inclusion of the likes of the catfish bon bons, smoked pig cheeks and pant-wettingly good beef short rib. And although the sandwiches and burgers are great, the real show-stoppers here are the sharing boards. They've clearly sourced some outstanding produce to make these luscious platters beyond sexy. And although they aren't huge in quantity, you will be hugely satisfied with the sheer quality of the meat they present to you. The service is on par with the great cuisine and enticing surroundings, making Lola Jeans Newcastle the perfect venue for any occasion. And if the message in this final paragraph wasn't clear - you are absolutely indebted to order a meat board here, your stomach demands it! 86%

Keco - Asian Authenticity

The Asian taste invasion continues, with yet another relatively new and very Chinese restaurant in Newcastle. It looks like Stowell street is longer enough to contain the abundance of brilliant Chinese cuisine that's being cooked up in Newcastle, as a new restaurant seems to pops up in the surrounding areas every other week. Keco is a strange one, but being strange doesn't mean it can't be utterly delicious. Situated next to the ever vulgar diarrhoea-mongering Chicken Cottage, Keco has a swath, clean cut finish unlike some of the more rustic siblings in the heart of China Town. This dark but seductive theme, along with it's very central location means it's not a bad place for nice evening meal followed by drinks in town.

Like many of the other Chinese restaurants on and near Stowell street, they feel compelled to offer a weak 'Western menu' (or Westren menu as they like to call it), offering dull sweet and sour generics and pitiful 'curry' <insert meat> dishes. They also have some poorly placed Thai dishes pasted into the menu for further pointlessness. Are there still culinary Neanderthals out there eating this muck? Thankfully, Keco has more than redeemed itself with a particularly strong Traditional menu, which boasts deeply intense flavours and interestingly delicious cuts of meat - indicative of truly authentic Chinese cuisine.

The Fat Spoon's life advice of Chinese restaurants? Always always always opt for the traditional/Chinese menu. There may well be some risk involved, but without that risk you wouldn't have the opportunity to sample something new and brilliant. Keco encompasses the sheer passion of Chinese cuisine in their monstrous hot pots, fiery hot dried beef, oddly-named man and wife offal slices, and their outstandingly rich belly pork dishes. Don't be afraid of dishes served cold. Don't be afraid of dishes with weird names. And definitely don't be afraid of eating offal. The Chinese have mastered these dishes for centuries and Keco can replicate them at a fantastic standard. One of the greatest benefits of living in a multicultural city is having access is to these foreign wonders of taste. The large portions mean the food is very well priced, and although English might not the be the serving staff's first language (or second of third), they are ultra friendly and welcoming. Visit soon and try something that would probably scare your Grandma. 83%

Mantra Thai Dining - Prayer of Deliciousness

Unfortunately it seems that poor management and complacency saw the demise of what was the Waterside Palace Chinese restaurant, but thankfully this made way for a beautiful new restaurant to flourish - Mantra. And Mantra really is as ornate and as vibrant as the brilliant Thai cuisine that they serve. After entering this temple of golden serenity you will quickly be given a warm Thai welcome from a member of the very accommodative staff, before being taken to your table.

They're attention to detail and passion for style doesn't stop with the venue, their unique menu reflects their effort and showcases some great Thai dishes. What's unique about Mantra is that their menu doesn't just cover all of the more commercial Thai dishes that the typical punters are looking for. But they also offer authentic traditional Thai cuisine that those with fond back-packing memories of Thailand will be delighted to sample. And unlike some South East Asian restaurants in Newcastle, they haven't butchered the classics by adding European vegetables or alien flavours. They've held true to their roots and committed to intense flavour and of course chilli - plenty of heat, the way Thai cuisine should be. Those who want the real deal can ask the staff for recommendations to obtain that perfect dish. Their signature dishes are an absolute must and include the likes of rich duck curry, Somtum (green papaya salad), Seabass married with tamarind and lamb shank Massaman curry. 

The clean cut service, stunning décor and polished dishes tell you that this is a higher end restaurant, so don't expect any cheap smut here. This is no Bigg market diner. Quality does come at a cost, but at the same time, the pricing at Mantra certainly isn't over the top. Their wine list and drinks menu is also well constructed and offers the perfect accompaniments for the sheer volume of flavour delivered by the food. Finally, a Thai restaurant perfect for marking those special occasions. 86%

Lola Jeans - Tynemouth Tastiness

Tynemouth is now well established is a fantastic place to drink and socialise, particularly when the weather is right. But with winter now threatening Newcastle's favourite seaside resort, it's a good thing that Tynemouth is also supported by some great little eateries. Like some of the others in the area, Lola Jeans is another hybrid bar-gastropub. And thankfully it's got the balance just about right.

Walking into this welcoming and warm bar will have you hunting for the menu almost immediately, as punters all around you tuck into their gourmet burgers and planks of animal. The simple ale and cocktails list is inclusive without being overwhelming and will see you with your drink of choice quickly. Sometimes the best drink is the one that's in your mouth the quickest. And although the food menu appears just as simple, the finished products are much far more constructed, beautiful and delicious than you first expected. The service is also friendly whilst remaining informative, just what you'd want from a good gastro-pub.

Alongside the filthy good burgers and decadent ciabattas they also have a range of great little meals, featuring plenty of fresh and flavoursome produce like crayfish, black pudding, calamari and steak. Portions are sufficient but not huge, so the greeders may wish to opt for a solo attempt at one of their loaded meat boards. Although the Jamie Oliver inspired use of chopping boards to deliver food only serves to enrage the Fat Spoon, it is often a great way of translating masses of meat from kitchen to mouth. There's only one gripe with Lola Jeans - the chairs. Wonky, frail and missing chunks; many of them look like they've been sexually assaulted by a drunk bear. But if you're fortunate enough to get a seat on one of the sofas or more sturdy items of furniture, you'll be able to enjoy your food in comfort. All in all, the perfect place for a gourmet pub lunch. 80%

DOJO - A Huge Fistful of Flavour

The Japanese takeover continues, as DOJO is yet another very fresh, vibrant and delicious Japanese dining experience that has recently set up shop in Newcastle. And it really has taken it's appearance very seriously; the venue is as bright and bold on the inside as it is on the outside. As the name suggests, it's loosely themed on a Japanese martial arts gym, clearly fuelled on bucket loads of LSD. But DOJO isn't just a pretty face, they've clearly also been training hard in the kitchen.

The equally as vibrant menu that DOJO offers may well throw you off your feet. It delivers everyone's favourite Japanese dishes, but also some more obscure dishes for the adventurous, such as their Lobster hot pot, soft shell crab tempura and teriyaki rock oysters. Die hard fans may prefer the way other places do their Katsu curry, but if you're looking to take on a new and exciting bout of Japanese culture, then DOJO is where you'll find it. Like the recently reviewed Osaka, they have a very impressive selection of various sushi, nigiri and sashimi, all served at blackbelt level quality. But what sets DOJO apart, is their very well constructed Teishoku set dinners, which allow you to mix your favourite elements of Japanese food and comes at wallet friendly price...think Bento box but better.

The blazing cuisine and ass-kicking visuals at DOJO are perfectly complimented by ferociously brilliant serving staff. Their perfected knowledge of the cuisine means that they can also suggest a meal to your taste, if taking on the roasted eel set meal is too tough an opponent. DOJO really has the whole package, blending a lively atmosphere with solid flavours in a beautifully elegant way. All the spirit of a real-life Japanese dojo, none of the strange over-weight blackbelts, dirty old mats or cumulatively pungent sweaty smells. 90%

Mrs. Ali's - The Benchmark Balti House

Mrs Ali's is a long standing firm favourite with students, professionals and families a like, and that's probably down to the consistency and simplicity of their service. All of their dishes come in at a good standard, a fair price and are reasonable in size. There's nothing ground breaking at Mrs Ali's, but that isn't her game plan, she just wants to see everyone fed on some solid Asian cuisine. And at that mission, this place is definitely bang on the money.

All of the typical curries are there - rogan Josh, lamb gosht, tandoori chicken and the likes, as well as some exemplary, freshly baked naans. Unfortunately they also still serve atrocities like Peshwari naans, chicken kormas and other vulgarities of western 'Indian' cuisine. The Fat Spoon does not approve of such smut, there's probably more culture in some Dixy's chicken out of a bin near the Gate. But at least they're keeping everyone happy, and there's much more authentic cuisine on the menu to outweigh the filth. Going for their highly sharable set menu is not only great value for money, but also covers all bases in the curry house experience.

The service at Mrs Ali's is definitely to be commended, because unlike many of the curry houses in the country, the waiting staff aren't moody, illiterate or have some sort of issue with using deodourant. In fact they are particularly welcoming here, with Mrs Ali herself often at the front of house to welcome diners. However, the best feature of Mrs Ali's has to be exceptional value for money, particularly with the 6 course happy night offer, available on Thursdays and Sundays. Enough food to keep anyone happy and covers all of the specials on the menu (prawns have a small supplementary charge) and is accompanied with a glass of wine. This wine may taste like tramp chunder mixed with the sweat of a fat man, but the food itself is a huge bargain alone. 81%

The Scrumpy Willow And Singing Kettle - Veggie Haven

The Fat Spoon loves originality. And this alternative little café on Percy Street definitely has it by the bucket load, the main aim of their game being able to cater for vegans, vegetarians and gluten-dodgers in addition to the omnivore masses. The setting is quaint and rustic, but does have a warming feel to it...looking a little like mystics meg's dining room versus your Grandma's house. Despite it's dainty size, you can usually find a table amongst the hippie types floating about, usually discussing tea leaves in far too much details. But this theme of relaxed randomness continues with their menu, which covers breakfast options, Eastern and Indian dishes, as well as contemporary sandwiches, some interesting fish entries and some pretty perfect home baking.

It's all about homemade bait here, and they do what they can to make as much of it as possible on this tiny site. And largely it turns out pretty nice, the baked goods in particular are outstanding. They are the masters of bread and cake. Bow down and kiss the free-range, anti-government, team-nature, organic-lovers ring. And once you've tried their brilliantly rich cakes, scones and treats...you may well follow suit. They've got breakfast covered pretty well too, although portions aren't very big, you can really appreciate the wholesome nature of their takes on classic breakfasts. As said, there is plenty of choice for vegetarians, including some chunky dhal, ever glorious - grilled halloumi and of course falafel. Although on one occasion, the falafel let the side down. What should have been a patty of fried chickpea and coriander goodness tasted more like a ball of desiccating and bland gram flour shame. Don't skimp on the basics Scrumpy!

The service is largely very friendly, although failing to ask how the food was, is always something that will let the experience down. A restaurant should always be proud of their food and should always have the customer's review at the very forefront of their mind. This makes The Scrumpy a rather mixed bag nuts ... probably not dissimilar to many of the clientele. All-in-all it's worth donning your dreadlocks, bohemian clothing and book about 'igniting your free spirit', because The Scrumpy Willow and Singing Kettle has got some organic delights to behold. Particularly if you fear meat like gingers fear the sun, have a serious affliction with all things gluten or just love a bit of good old-fashioned afternoon tea and cake. 71%